Can anybody tell me, exactly where I am?

The entire fabric of my reality is failing me.

I would imagine that the ones closest to us would be the first ones to share whatever they have to share.
Instead they hide their fears, their stories, themselves really.
To share themselves with others.

What am I a shadow? A hollow man that has no impact in the life of the other.
I feel completely lost in this world of deception that happens everyday.
That I cannot tell or show my feelings from a far, because the diffraction of the light will somehow twist my words, my actions, and will give an image of a different person.

Should I be close or far?
No matter. It is not my choice.
I can only wait.
That is my choice.
I wait to be evicted from a world I decided to enter.
There is no easy way to wait for the facts that do not depend on us.
I wish somehow that I was stronger or wiser or luckier to see life in a funnier light.
I need to laugh from all this.
I need to end this misery that is my failed perspective of that which cannot be.

Meanwhile, I look for the map. I find nothing. I am dyslexic and lose my words and my expression.
I have no hollow pursuits, I AM an hollow pursuit!
A doppelganger that is living my life with a different energy and I am slowly realising that this is not me.
But then who am I?
Where am I?
What am I doing here?

I am sure Mr. David Lynch is somewhere lurking. Possibly he is writing this plot of a life as I am telling you this faint words.

Today, I wish I would faint and wake up in numbness...
Wait, I am already.
Instead give me a purpose, something that takes me from the moor, from this quick sand that prevents me from moving on.

And so, I will take my steps!
Where will I go?
It doesn't matter, because no one tells me exactly where I am ?
The one who could tell me where we are, is not talking!
And neither will I!